So who ordered the @!#*!% twister?
by Patrick Moore

"Have you ever been caught up in a tornado? I hadn’t, until a few days ago, and I had no real idea what it would be like. After all, one doesn’t expect such things in gentle Sussex. And certainly not when tucking into an excellent chicken curry - as an astronomer friend and I were doing at the local Indian restaurant.

The canopy outside the restaurant started flapping - and then the front window smashed and a slate flew in and landed on the floor. The next thing we knew there was a vortex of air which came in horizontally through the hole in the glass. It was carrying all sorts of bits of rubbish including chunks of ice the size of golf balls and small bits of slate. If anyone had been in its path it would have cut them to shreds. It went through the restaurant smashing up everything in its wake, dropping big lumps of ice and slate as it went. Trays of poppadoms went flying and the owner of the restaurant had to hold on to the bar to stop the vortex from knocking him off his feet. We took cover as best we could and I feared for my life. It was terrifying stuff and the most amazing thing was it was all over so quickly."

As soon as the twister disappeared Patrick and his friend Roy Bird emerged from under the table before fleeing to Patrick’s house, leaving a plate of Chicken Jalfrezi half-eaten and a portion of Chicken Briani, along with a plate of onion bhajees. Patrick continues his story...

"My main worry was about my house. Farthings, where I live, is very ancient (it was certainly standing in 1450) and is mainly thatched. For a moment I thought that we had escaped completely - but then I shone my torch down the main garden, and saw my observatory, or what was left of it. This is the observatory which houses my reflector telescope. It was a sorry site. The dome had been lifted completely off its base, and had been thrown clear of the main building. It was broken and twisted, and the telescope lay at a crazy angle. Obviously the entire observatory would have to be be rebuilt.I made my way round to the back paddock where I have my other observatory housing my main telescope - a reflector with a 15in mirror. The damage there was not so bad, but it was clear that there would have to be extensive repairs. As for the house - there was slight thatch damage, but nothing major. The reason it escaped, whereas the observatory didn’t, was that the track of the whirlwind was so narrow - not more than a few yards across. Only when daylight came was it possible to see the extent of the damage elsewhere. The High Street was littered with glass, tiles and general rubble, but things were worse on the eastern side of the village. The row of shops in what is known as East Beach was really badly damaged, and no windows were left.

The main bonus was that nobody had been killed, and so far as I have been able to find out there have been no injuries. Thankfully, tornadoes of this kind are fairly rare in England. Having experienced one for the first time I can now definitely state that they are things which I can well do without. Particularly at an Indian restaurant in Sussex!"

Copied from the International Express, Tuesday January 13th 1998.

Thanks to Lynnete Rens for passing this on.